brown eyed fox

one to grow on

feeling, sharingcarissa fox24 Comments

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looking in the mirror at a forty something.
well… not QUITE yet but…
it’s at my heals so…
i’ve been thinking about it.

do you ever meet somebody… and find out how old they are…
and then think to yourself…
”do i look like that?”
”is that how i look?”
not that they look old per se… just older than YOU tHiNk YOU look.

realizing… that i am there.
at the cusp of the THAT age.
that stage.

let me first say…
i am GREAT with it… to be completely honest.
and i mean that!
i feel like i am getting “better” WITH age.
i used to hear people say that…
i didn’t get it.
i NOW do!

there ARE things that i wish i could leave at the curb…
that have started following me all of a sudden.
like the broken capillaries on my face… UGHHH… don’t like those.
insomnia.
joint pain.
where DID my memory go?
GRAVITY!
if i laugh too hard i pee (did i just say that).
crows feet… they’re for the birds.
just to name a FEW.

oh the fun!

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so i put some thoughts on paper.
just some things i would like to tackle before the three turns to a four.
it’s not some profound list… but for me it fits.  
some of the things are VERY simple… some are BIG.
some i’ve done before… and want to do again.
some are serious… some are seriously just for FUN.
some you won’t get… but i do.

i have 39 things.
one is left open for a reason.
to grow on… for more time to discover it… for maybe a great idea from you.

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approaching the big four o also makes me reflect.
A LOT.
on so many things.
things i did in my life (i regret) (wow).
things i did (i’m glad i did).
things… memories i have… that make my heart smile.

i can not get over how blessed i feel… how blessed i am.
sure… there have been some down times… boy howdy… and there will be more.
they have shaped ME though.
who i am.
who i strive to be.

it’s interesting to think of WHO we are… HOW we got here…
ALL the decisions we made… choices… that led us down OUR path.
our very unique path.
that winding road…
that somehow led us to where we ARE.

sitting here facing forty… but REALLY… feeling fancy free.
feeling like the best IS yet to come.

like the sky is the limit really. you know?
it’s just how we choose to fly it.